In January I made a promise. It was a promise to my friends (both online and in real life), to my family, and most of all to myself. I promised to take the brevity of my sister’s time on earth, and learn from it. I promised to make the most of the time that I have and stop killing myself with food. So far it has been an empty promise, full of excuses and procrastination.
Last week, I went to my doctor’s office and signed up for their medical weight loss program. I made the appointment for the following day, and started right there in the middle of the week. There were no thoughts of this not being an ideal time, or starting on Monday. There was only action.
I have not weighed in, not even at home, so I can’t speak to the effectiveness of my first week. I did want to go ahead and jump back on the Mamavation Monday routine, and thought I would focus on a couple of the things I did right this week.
My first non-scale victory was when my new nutritionist told me I could have a one week pass from exercise. I didn’t even hesitate to decline that offer. She also told me to quit my diet soda, 100% cold turkey. While I didn’t have a problem with any of the restrictions they were placing on me, I did have a mini panic attack when she broke this news. I have quit soda before, and I know how it makes me feel. I had no desire to feel that way again, but I promised to try. Try I did. I have been nursing the same nasty bottle of Diet Sunkist all week. I keep leaving it the fridge in case I feel like I have to take a taste. I also still have an emergency bottle in fridge at home, at my Locksmith office, and at the bank. You know, in case there is a diet soda emergency. There they sit, and I have had little desire to even have one.
Now, of all of the things I did right this week, I also found a major weakness. I found that I stockpile my calories throughout the day. I figured out that I am afraid I will be hungry and there will be no more calories for me to eat. That is when I find myself at the end of the day with a fairly decent calorie deficit. I think I have figured out that if I plan dinner first, it allows me to know that I will be just fine for dinner. That gives me enough comfort to knock that deficit in half. Now if I could just learn how to snack.