This journey is a marathon, and not a race…right? So in this path to wellness, I have been learning some interesting things about myself. For instance, I used to think that I excel in a competitive environment, especially if that competition was a long shot. So I signed up for my first DietBet and committed to losing 4% of my body weight in 4 weeks. It was going so well, I signed up for a second one.
Before I knew it I was focused more on the DietBet than I was on the big picture, I lost sight of my goals, became stressed out, and sabotaged my weight loss. When I came face to face with losing not just $25 but a total of $75, I decided that it was a small price to pay to learn this about myself. I let go of the competitions and the stress that came along with them. In the end I was within a pound of winning and was totally ok with it and my decision to not participate in these types of competitions again.
I have also been really working toward my fitness goals since my embarrassing two hour completion of the 5k in Savannah. I decided to merge my latest fitness interests with my passion for fundraising for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and join the LLS Team in Training program. I will have to admit that I was a little terrified when I was signed up for the San Diego Half Marathon right off the bat. At first I embraced the fear because stepping outside of your comfort zone is a good thing, right? But, soon it became about how I was going to get away for one of the travel team’s half marathons, and less about my fitness. The stress got to me and my workouts started slipping.
It is a bitter pill for me to swallow to realize that I cannot easily get away for the West coast marathons, the locally endorsed ones are too soon for me to be ready, and the one that I can drive to and be ready for also falls on my daughter’s 8th birthday (preventing me from seeing her at all). I am constantly
looking for room on my plate but this particular goal just keeps rolling off the top and onto the floor. I cannot decide if San Diego is something I just have to make the time for “at any cost” or if it is a rational choice for me to choose a more functional plan. I know that I am the only one who can answer that, but I would love to hear feedback as I take the weekend to mindfully and carefully make this decision. I am certain that I can hear many of your voices and the words you want to say already anyway, so bring it on.
One might say that I have learned how to give up or not stick with things, but I beg to differ. I am learning what helps me stick to the most important things and what does not. I am not interested in giving up my big prize of a long and healthy life with my amazing family to win a bet. This determination will bring an understanding of where my boundaries must be…eventually. Until then, I guess I must get used to some trial and error without taking it as one more personal failure.
March 16, 2013 @ 3:43 am
It’s a tough one. Only you can make the decision that works best for you and for your family. Personally, anything that is going to throw you off your goals doesn’t seem to be a good thing. So if doing one closer to you at a later date works for you, then that is what you do. Where ever you decide to walk, I will be there as long as it is possible. I am in this 100% with you!